June 24th – Last Run – Post Season Awards

The stage was set LAST run of the session 8 players, 4 on 4 showdown!!! To make things even better Cuso makes his triumphant return setting up a battle with the man that took over as the most dangerous offensive weapon since he left Schweid.

Also, Usdin shows up for the SECOND week in a row which if I was a betting man I would give better odds on me dunking in one of our games then that happening.

Teams were as follows:

The all hair team of Cuso, Usdin, Barile, and Braunstein
VS.
Crimson and Red of Schweid, Dorf, Smitty, and Dave Lewis.

Game 1 was a blur with Crimson and Red at home playing hustle D, Schweid launching shots like he was mad at the net and Smitty playing with a chip on his shoulder feeling that he was slighted in the rankings…This wasn’t much of a game, 8-4 C&R.

Game 2 was much closer but was still controlled by C&R…Once again Schweid was simply lovely hitting shots, Smitty/Dorf/Dave doing a nice job of backing him up basically passing the ball and moving out of the way. BOY that kid likes to shoot. 8-6 C&R

Game 3 had The all Hair Team down 0-2 returns home to try and stop the bloodshed and they did. Cuso was hitting shots, Usdin finally settled in and Barile was hitting the lefty hook. Schweid was off this game going 3 for 59 as they switched Braunstein the Battier of the night onto him flustering Schweid to no end. Game was controlled by The All Hair Team who won in a nail biter 8-7.

Game 4…Smitty declares that the last 6 games were one with the Home team going the “doorway”…Well that would all change, a hard fought battle with both teams exchanging leads back and forth back and forth…Finally C&R would prevail once again 8-7, going up 3-1 in the best of 7 series.

Game 5…Hair won’t go down without a fight, Cuso not himself at this point hobbling around, Usdin “I’m not in game shape”, Barile and Jay even looking a bit fatigued..HOWEVER , they just won’t go down…Again a hard fought battle, with the eventually again coming down to the buzzer this time (I can’t remember the exact score) I’m guessing it was 8-6 however.

GAME 6…This will forever go down as, well nothing, it was just the last game…Hair just ran out of “moose” this game and had nothing left in the tank. Prior to the game Schweid pulled me over and said “we have to win now, I have nothing left”…And we did…Schweid hit a layout going to his right to close this one out…

All in all guys GREAT last night, solid way to end a season. With a heavy heart we bid farewell to Cuso who will not be coming back next season due to moving and having a kid (congrats Cuse)…The rest of you we start back up in September, I will be contacting everyone in the next month or so to see who is in. Lastly, the Post Season Awards, Brought to you by Vagisil.

MVP…For the first time ever this is going to 2 people because both missed too many weeks individually to merit the award, but they both were clearly dominant when there…Congrats to DOUGY CRANE & 2ND time MVP SCHWEID.
Honorable mention...Josh Deutsch (few more games and he may have had this solo)

MOST IMPROVED…From start of the season (airballs consistently) to the finish (lefty hooks) Plainview bread Joey Barile deserves this award…Now only if he can write a blog.

UNSUNG HERO…When he is not turning the ball over a few times to start a game, there is no more solid teammate then my choice for UNSUNG HERO Chris ‘Smitty’ Smith with his tough D, foul line jumpers, and overall attitude!!!
Honorable Mention: Jay Braunstein

DOORMAN THAT WON'T LET YOU IN WITHOUT A BALL (formerly Battier award), DEFENSIVE STOPPER AWARD...Too easy, yet this man just plain deserves it. He'll guard anyone on the court, grab a board, even block shots, Goff this ones for you!!

ACE WE TRY HARDER…congrats Neallllllllllllllllllll there is no one that appreciates being in the game more and he shows it with pure sweat and determination out there!!!

WHERE HAVE YOU GONE AWARD...Always dominated by USDIN this year with his last two weeks in a row, this award goes to DJ shiftee himself Sam "I am going to be in Botswana and can't make it" Zornow.

MADE UP AWARD FOR DAVE LEWIS AND JON DORFMAN...Simply don't know where to put either of us, we both had some real solid weeks then some not so solid weeks, so lets just say we aspire to be MVP's, we try hard, play hard D, and just love the game.

See you all soon!!!

6/10 Run Recap - Rusty sucks

BG here ... I was on the victorious squad last week, but have been thrust into writing this blog because the responsibility was put on Rusty - but he declined... Apparently he started a new job on Monday (but notice he wasn't doing anything Wed night through Sunday), and is incapable of paying off his "debts" after work like the rest of us normal working folk do ....

Anyway - I digress ....

The week started at an all-time late 6:41 last week. We were expecting 9, however, Braunstein was confirmed as a late-show ... After calling out Margo in run-wide email - I later learned that I'm an asshole - and Margo had a legitimate excuse - and again - let's just say I'm an asshole.

With limited time and 8 true playas .... We decided a Best-out-of-Five showdown...

Good Guys:
Goff, Crane, Salis, Barille

Bad Guys:
Rusty, Braunstein, Lewis, Smitty

First games was a bit of a blur. Barille, Salis, Crane took care of business pretty efficiently. I forget the score - but it was a well played game on both ends. Salis made 4 of 5 of his open jumpers (or arond there) Rusty made his usual "wows" of those that never saw his style of play. When he's hitting that outside shot - he's almost impossible for any 30 something Jew to guard... It was for naught, though, as Good guys took the game fairly handily.

Second game was a D. Crane highlight reel. He seriously missed maybe 2 times... I'm on Doug's teams often and here is the skinny... The guy only knows one speed - which is "non-stop" ... but because of this (and let's just say his stamina isn't what it used to be), he's at his best in the first two games - and I'll say in this specific game - he was the best I've ever seen him. Hitting absolutely everything, mostly all net. While I made a C. Sale-like joke to Rusty (that Crane wasn't hitting all those shots last game when Rusty was guarding someone else), I think the right move woulda been to double team Doug and leave me wide open.... Seriously...
Good guys won a close game 2 - with D. Crane scoring I think 9 of the 8 points. ;)

Down 0-2, Bad Guys got back home floor and the team seemed inspired by D. Cranes game. They won really easily as the Good guys seemed on cruise control. D. Lewis started being a bit more aggresive and starting jiving with Rusty style of play. Braunstein hit a few 5 footers, Smitty hit a couple standard 9 foot "jump" (if that's what you call 3 inches off the ground) shots -- and I think the score was an ugly 8-3.

Game 4 was Rusty's matching D. Cranes game 2. There was nothing anyone could do - he just straight-up balled. Throughout the whole night, bad guys were pretty solid on the glass, but I remember Good guys usually only got one shot on offense... It was a bit closer - but bad guy won game 4 - forcing the decisive Game 5 - up to 11....

Bad Guys having all the momentum ... Starting to gel with the new sub .... BUT ... That's when the Good Guys got back down to basics. With Rusty guarding Doug, and Lewis focusing on shutting down the offensive prowess that is B 2 the G.... Braunstein was gaurding Big Bad Barille. We decided to get Barille on the block and have him go to work.... Braunstein always plays decively bigger and stronger than one may seem, (as does Smitty btw), but we had to make the size advantage count ... and so we forced it down on the block for the first 3 posessions - and Barille made em count. Bad Guys kept it close - but throw in a put-back rebound from B 2 The G, consistant shooting from Salis, and D. Crane hitting some timely J's .... Good guys were in command most of the game. (I do want to point out - the single sportscenter highlight of the evening was cut by the editing staff - after Salis missed the wide open lay-up given to him by a no-look, over-the-head-pass by yours truly) ... Bad guys made it close towards the end scoring 3 straight points... tying the game at 10-10. With a few on-lookers, was decided win by two up to 15. But the next 2 points went pretty quickly ... D. Crane got a good bounce on a 10 footer... Good guys made a stop ... and Barille came down shot a 12 footer and ended the game....

Definitely a great run.... however ... the lack of respect for the blog writing is starting to increase. Dorf and I wrote the last two week in place of other folks .... Last time I "fill in" - so I fear the tradition will be short-lived..... Here's hoping it's not ....

Looking forward to the run tomorrow....

Comeback heard around the World!!!

It started with “See you there Jon”, the infamous last words of Christopher ‘Smitty’ Smith. It ended with the greatest comebacks in Allen Stephensen Wednesday Night 6-8pm time slot Jewish pickup basketball history…

G2 Smitty, Josh Deutsche, Jay Braunstein, and Joey Barile

vs.

Original Gatorade Dorf, Goffin, Dougy Crane, and Nealllllllll

Game 1 was won in a hard fought battle by G2 8-7, this was the start of the series that rivals the Federer / Nadal Wimbledon battle!!!

Game 2 was once again won by G2 8-6 as they continued to play GREAT team defense by not allowing any easy hoops…They looked like the Pistons of the late 80’s, even when Smitty was called out for yelling “foul him” he offered no apologies, instead saying “what, should we let him score”???? Fair question SMit.

Game 3 Original Gatorade vowed to win after returning to their home court, even guaranteeing it, well like MO Williams they were wrong and G2 pulled ahead 3-0…Again the words “see you there Jon” were murmured by Mr. Smith…Well, what happens next went kinda like this…

Game 4 Original Gatorade came out gunning, with Neal hitting an opening layup the FIRST easy hoop of the night…it continued with Dorf & Crane hitting Jumpers and Goff controlling the boards…Outcome 8-2 Originals….

Game 5 well it was much of the same as a stunned G2 team couldn’t get over the embarrassment of game 4 and Original blasting them 8-4…You could start to see the belief in these young mens faces…And the sold out crowd chanting BEAT G2 BEAT G2, was the send off they needed as they had to go back to the unfriendly confines of Low Calorie Stadium.

Game 6 back at home, G2 had their confidence restored with Josh Deutsch absolutely lighting up a tired Jon Dorfman…HOWEVER, this wouldn’t be enough as finally the Originals won the close one 8-7…Can they do it, will they do it????

Game 7 started at 7:51, with the 8pm crew breathing down our necks this was a fast paced no rest game…1/1, 2/2…Are you guys almost finished…3/3…4/4…Seriously you guys almost done…Next hoops wins no lets play to 6…The rest as they say is History… Final score 6 – 4 in a time shortened finally!!!!

Wednesday May 13 - Authored by Dougy C

I'm learning more and more each week about a young baller named Deutsche. Another solid week, and I have been most surprisingly impressed with his mid range game. In addition, his toughness and intelligence has been excellent on the court of late. Jon D has been draining his jump shots to go along with his always steady penetration through the lane and leadership at the point. Lets not forget the tear drops ala Tony Parker he has brought to his repertoire. Goff always brings his A game, by A game I mean crashing the boards and getting those always important dirty buckets. If Goff can find his touch from 8-12 feet he will be a top 5 player every night. I have been inspired by Jay Braunstein's desire on the hardwood after his almost career threatening achilles injury. He is a critical piece to any club on the floor, playing a role players game, scoring, defense, all the intangibles. Joe "new kid on the block" Barile is learning the run on the job. Each run that passes I see vast improvements to his game. He needs to be more consistent in the post and he will be a dominant big with this run each week. Mr. Crane has stepped up his game on the defensive side of the ball. Swatting down would be dumps in the post and taking the turnovers down the other side of the court. He has 0Aworked extremely hard to get his conditioning to game level. I don't think we have seen the optimum level of play from smitty yet this season. he is due for a breakout week. This was a subpar week for him, shot is flat, D is lax, I need to see more before I can give him a passing grade. I give salis an incomplete this week due to his early departure, hopefully he can come back with next week with a clear mind and focus on his always dynamic team play and shot making ability. Dave Lewis has been as hot and cold as they come. Last Wednesday was another example of that. He needs to spread his consistency throughout the entire game. Sometimes shooting lights out 10-10 from the field early on and than 2-11 from the field down the stretch. Jamie "bling bling" Schweid had a below average week from the powerhouse star out of Indiana. The Bobby Knight diamond in the rough was letting the shots fly but was unsatisfied with his play. After the game, Schweid was seen outside the arena drinking an unknown bottle from a brown bag and talking to two hookers. The details of the conversation were undisclosed.

Good run last week boys.

May 6th Recap - Josh Deutsche

It was an auspicious start for team Dorfman, Lewis, Braunstein and Barile. Dorfman was swishin and dishin, Lewis was percolating from the top of the key, and Barile was a resounding rebounder under the basket (big ups Clyde!). After three consecutive victories, they enjoyed a reputation of invincibility and some opposing players had enough. During their early exits, Salis was heard commenting on the winning team's youthful exuberance, and Goffin mentioned something about monopolizing court time and injustice.

So who was going to stand up to these guys? That formidable task was left to the team of Deutsch, Smitty, Crane and Margo. Game 1 of this three-game set was intense and competitive, featuring some extraordinarily accurate shooting by Dave Lewis. Like John Starks used to do against Michael Jordan, I valiantly attempted to match each of Dave's baskets with one of my own on the other end of the court. But with the game tied 7-7, Dave very coolly drained the winning shot from the top of the key.

In game 2 of the series, team Dorfman, Lewis, Braunstein and Barile finally showed a chink in the armor. After his Kobe-esque shooting from the previous game, Lewis went ice cold, and the opposing team capitalized on the opportunity. Smitty played Dorfman very tough in the paint, Margo hit a couple long shots that would have been three-pointers in any other gym, and Barile could not keep up with Crane's constant motion on offense. After evening the series at 1 a piece, we were headed to a decisive game 3.

In game 3, fatigue set in for team Deutsch, Crane, Smitty and Margo. Multiple layups were missed and jump shots repeatedly hit the front of the rim. After the game, an exhausted Crane could be heard asking Barile for fitness tips. Dorfman, however, did not slow down, and he was able to get some easy fast-break points and uncontested jumpers. Barile added a couple baby-hook shots and then Braunstein used his patented reverse layup to put the game out of reach.

Week 3 Recap - Neal Cohen

Once i start writing i can't stop...so if its a bit long let me know.

Wednesday's run set a few marks that have not been matched yet this season, as far as I'm aware:
1) We had the longest game of the year, lasting close to 25 minutes as Neal, Dorf, Joe and Josh (game winning shot) defeated Dave, Sam, Goff and Jay in what those playing called an defensive battle while Crane and Smitty felt it was a painful display of offense to sit and watch for almost a half hour.
2) Biggest age difference between two players guarding each other as smitty attempted to guard the shifty 22 year old Sam for a game, but he did a better job than Jason Kidd would do on Derrick Rose.
3) The sign of a good night of Wednesday hoops is when we had another record... most players who have the court after us watching the Gatorade blog game, as there had to be at least 5 guys waiting for us to finish.

Some fashion awards from Wednesday include Josh converting from the suit, which he hangs from a side hoop in a garment bag into the Charlotte Hornets #2 LJ jersey he got for a birthday gift in high school. Goff losing the high socks for the week, and then randomly throwing on the head band for the 2nd to last game only which he won, to then take it off for the Gatorade game, which he lost. Crane going with the funeral outfit sporting black from top to bottom.
.
Dorfs high school buddy Joe made his season debut. Joe suffered some early jitters, with a few turnovers, air balls, which I can sympathize with, as he struggled to find his rhythm, but he picked the right game to find his game, as he could be considered the MVP of the Gatorade game.

As i can't remember each game and the details the way smitty somehow can, one note was that a team with two of the offensively inept players, Neal and Goff, along with Josh and Sam defeated crane, Dave, smitty and jay in the nights 2nd to last game (maybe it was the head band), but I credit the coaching move by Sam to switch a few defensive matchups in this game to the victory.

Gatorade game match up- Neal, Goff, Josh, and Sam vs. Dorf, Joe, Smitty & Jay. Sam came out firing from the outside, but the shot wasn't falling the way it was for most of the evening, so he started taking the ball to the hoop but had trouble finishing with all traffic in the paint. Josh started taking his game outside away from the Post where he struggled to the top of the key where he found his stroke carrying his team in this game getting help from the role players Goff and Neal who were active on the offensive boards, as their team was up early and feeling comfortable, with the score 5-2(give or take a point or two). At that point Joey B woke up and began knocking down shots that he was struggling to hit all night, Jay started hitting jumpers, Dorf making acrobatic lay-ups and smitty hitting his signature right side, short range bank shot, helping lead their team back to a 7-7 tie. The game was closed out by the staple reverse lay-up by Jay who, while I never saw his game pre-injury, has been more and more of a force on both ends of the court each week this season.

Individual reviews:
Dorf- he won the Gatorade game and that's all that matters to him. Although his FGs made on pull-ups at the top of the key was down considerably from recent weeks. While he had plenty of highlights his 20 foot jumper on 'point game' is one Jon knows was out of the schweid school of shot selection.

DL- a late night out Monday, a late hoops game Tuesday = Dave's performance Wed night. Will he be back in game shape before baby Lewis arrives?

Smitty- Solid performance, only complained once during the "marathon game", and depending on his age guarded a kid who may not have been born when smitty had his bar mitzvah (assuming he's Jewish)

Crane- that "crane" game where he carries his team never happened, but did have a great block on Josh in the post

Jay- continued improvement, getting more aggressive at both ends of the court, only yelling "oh JAY!" twice, well below his avg

Joe - slow start in his debut but a strong finish and a good win/ loss record. Potential to be a physical presence in this game among guys who don't lift weights

Josh- the baseline jumper attempts weren't as frequent, nor were the baskets in the paint yet was still among the top performers on court knocking down a few game winner and countless mid range jumpers. He must make the LJ 'L' arm signal going forward on every hoop if he wears that jersey again

Sam- came out on fire, couldn't miss from the outside, actually shooting a better fg % from outside the paint than in the paint. a few incredible dribble moves though some didn't result in a hoop. When he starts dishing off his dribble penetration more, it'll be tough to get his team off the court

Goff- you really have to box him out, if not he'll make you pay, grabbing countless offensive rebounds. a few flashes in the paint on offense as well, still not looking for the mid-range jump shot. a see lots of Joakim Noah in his game.

Neal- played every game, as his FTs made to keep playing was close to his baskets made in actual game play. Good bounce back after last week's disaster of a performance, after only 1 made hoop and struggling to guard anyone.

a week where no team was ever able to establish any sort of dominance.

see you after memorial day

4-22 Run - Authored by Smitty

The evening started off with some major question marks on a night when our fearless leader (Dorfman) was in Canada entertaining clients, and one of our players just returned from Canada after partying all night with clients (name omitted for legal reasons). Schweid pulled out without officially pulling out (thanks for the non-commit commit) and Joe Barile texted a last minute cancellation to Dorfman. At approximately 6:10pm there were six (Braunstein, Goffin, Deutsch, Ron, Neil Cohen, Zornow) people looking at me wondering who the final player was. There were a few nervous moments as people checked blackberries trying to remember whom (and more importantly if) the eighth and final player was. Then through the door walked in Doug Crane and all was right at Allen Stephenson Middle School. The questions soon turned into one of the better runs of the year in a best of 5 series.

Good Guys – Deutsch, Ron, Smitty, Braunstein

Bad Guys – Zornow, Goffin, Crane, Cohen

The series went the distance with the final game going to 11. I think it’s safe to say that the offensive/defensive match-up of Deutsch and Zornow was possibly the best in the history of the game. Both players are relentless on the defensive end and Zornow’s ability to hit the 15-footer consistently throughout the night changed the complexion of the game. I don’t remember a full breakdown of every game so I will provide some clear thoughts and snippets.

Game 1 was the Doug Crane show as he lit up Smitty for five points, despite solid defense (F-you Dorf and Schweid – ask Doug, I played good defense), and Deutsch got used to Zornow’s first step.

Game 2 Crane went cold, Ron hit three jumpers from the corner and Braunstein and Smitty hit the short jumpers off terrific ball movement to provide the only blowout of the evening.

Games 3 and 4 went to 7-7 and were probably the most solid all around games of the night. Everyone seemed to have their wind (other then Neil who was clearly feeling the effects of his travels as he threw up three air balls and scored zero pts.) and the defensive intensity picked up dramatically. Zornow and Deutsch were battling every trip down the court, Smitty and Crane were exchanging baskets after running through multiple picks, Braunstein had the baseline reverse working (quick tangent – game 4 Braunstein driving in almost the same exact spot as his Achilles injury stumbled and almost fell as Doug and I watched in horror waiting for the scream – thankfully it was a stumble and all was well), Goffin was all over the offensive boards and was having trouble with his put backs, and Ron was starting to hit his shots from deep.

It was agreed that the final game of the night would be to 11 and for more then a few possessions we all regretted it. Missed shots, errant passes and a few “my bads” had us all looking at each other and questioning our decision. However, the game quickly picked up in intensity as the Bad Guys jumped out to the lead and Neil hit his first and most important shot of the evening. With the score 9-6 the Good Guys scored two quick baskets and had a stop on the defensive end leaving them with the ball and a chance at a tie. The next sequence of plays is the reason for my writing the blog. A backdoor cut left me with a wide open lay-up that would have tied the game and shifted the momentum fully to the Good Guys - of course it rolled out and led to an easy basket for the Bad Guys. Good Guys scored on the next possession, but were left staring at me as I let Crane get around a pick and score the final bucket of the evening.

All and all a great run that had great match-ups and intensity – great job everyone

Week 1 Dominance!!!

Greetings all, this is the first installment of the Gatorade Blog for the April Run.

I’d like to welcome the new guys Margo, Josh, Neal & Joey Barile to the game…

Last night can be summed up in one word Dominance!!!!

Before I get to that I want to focus on the growing Manship, Bromance, whatever you’d like to call it of Smitty and Schweid. First I find it a little convenient that Smitty was “running late” and showed up at the exact same time as Schweid. They were parked behind one and other on the street, c’mon this is New York that doesn’t happen without some planning.

Here is my theory Schweid has secretly always wished he attended Camp WahNee and finds comfort in an old schooler like Smitty. Smitty loves to win and figures attaching himself to last seasons MVP Schweid will allow him to do so…I’m going to be keeping a close eye on this moving forward!!!

Despite Smittys auspicious start…(Goff tracked him at a RECORD BREAKING pace of 1 turnover / 2 dribbles…This type of ratio hasn’t been seen since Efrem Kamen in the 1991 D Intercamp Game vs. Camp Scatico with 4 turnovers / 1 dribble…) Smitty closed the night by lighting me up in the final game with slashing moves and jumpers.

Now to the dominance….The team of Schweid, C. Sale, new comer Josh Deutsche and Smitty rolled off 7 straight, causing the crowd to call for an unprecedented reshuffling of the teams…I was staunchly against this (call me stubborn) but maybe I was wrong, this team couldn’t be stopped.

Schweid continued his torrid shooting pace with a 95% shot ratio, however to his credit he shot a solid 72.3% from the field going 81 of 112.

C Sale continues to refuse to lose continuing his dominance…One thought though, Chris you are a guest now, quit making proclamations and calling for rule changes!!!!!

Rookie Josh Deutsche filled a role, shooting corner jumper and rebounding…However, he was LIT UP by a # of people including Sub Ron Dugan (5pts in one game on him) and yours truly in game 1 and anytime he switched onto me…Deutsche normally a good defender was left with only this to say “Hey we won, what does it matter.” Truer words have never been spoken.

Smitty, I have already spoken about, he improved as the night went on, but man that start was UGLY!!! Like Deutchse he would simply say “We won…I love Gatorade”

Closing Thoughts…

Jay Braunstein good to have you back!!! A little turnover heavy last night, but had some nice swooping moves to the hoop.

Margo…showed ‘flashes’ of his former self, he needs to find his confidence and his wind though…I see good things out of this guy in the future.

Neal…Well Neal you looked good in the head band, you were VERY VERY quiet last night and started game one with two UGLY airballs…You did however play hard!!!!

Goff…I love the new aggressiveness on the offensive end…He was playing last night a little hampered and nervous about the bandage on his back, still he has no problem guarding anyone on the court!!! Once the back is set LOOK out!!!

Dorfman…Came out gunning, went 1-9 though last night and wins / losses are all that matter!!

Matt Usedin…you had me fooled last night, I REALLY thought you were going to show.

Dave Lewis…Way to gut it out my man, you’re still better then Jay on one leg!!!

Mandell / Cuso….You are both missed, Cuso heal up, Mandell get on line to get your baby a green card ASAP!!!!

Joey Barile…Expecting BIG things out of you!!!

I am out next week, Smitty will be heading up the game…Have a great week.

JD

End of Year Report

Ok guys, so this session is done and to say the least it has been an event filled season...Before I get to the end of the year report let me first talk about Week 12.

First off, the attendance was at best awful. In a season low only 6 regulars showed, with subs we only had 8 total which meant the first Gatorade Series of the season. The series was won by the team composed of Lou "the tank" Forte who spent all 6 games lighting up Dorfman....Lou's Boy "the wife beater" who is an assistant coach for Hofstra who although couldn't guard Sam the DJ still lit it up from the top of the key...John "tank ass" Ostrow who played solid on both ends and in my opinion was a wash with Neal "I have grown up" Cohen...and finally the man of the night Barry "energizer bunny" Herman who also showed shades of his Jack Gordon days by outplaying Smitty and by landing what is now being called THE SHOT (I'll get to that later).

Now to the Season Grades in no particular order...Feel free to comment...Also a sneak peak into the players who will be joining next run.

It's been a pleasure fellas!!!

Dorf

Josh "wahhh the train is so long" Mandell (Grade B-)...Joshy love to see you at the game and you will be missed in the April. Tough competitor his head just wasn't in it years end, still one of the most complete players at the game, see you in September.

Chris "I think I'll leave my ball in the car tonight" Smith (Grade B-)...Smitty, just wasn't all there at years end...Shot wasn't falling, he was hesitating. He has room for improvement on both the offensive and defensive ends, see you in two weeks.

Mike "I'm training for a triathlon so I don't respond to emails anymore" Lee (Grade C-) Started off strong but went the way of Newman and Dailey by not responding to any emails for the last 3 weeks...This is a no-no, he had potential it's a shame.

Doug "New Shoees" Crane (Grade B+) Best teammate to have on your team because he hits shots plays D and NEVER complains...Missed a bit too much of the action at years end, even with that though he has matching shoes and shorts now, he may just be unstoppable.

Jon "peaked too soon" Dorfman (Grade C) Lazy D toward the end of the year offensively focusing on the jumper...Not going to say too much here, I am just plain dissapointed in my play. Schweid you had it right just wasn't going to get any better then that one week.

Jared "smooth" Mancuso (Grade A-) Played with intensity at years end showing that he really can dominate whenever he wants...Unfortunately a late season ankle roll prevented him from playing the last week...Wish him a quick recovery.

Dave Lewis (Grade B)...Not much to say here, played solid all season...Looking to come back from a ankle injury for April

John Ostrow (Grade B-) Could have had a B but has decided to leave us for the April Session...Played well I think with more games under his belt he could have been a contender.

Barry "the shot" Herman (Grade B)...Like I said Barry that last shot gained you a full GRADE...swooping to his left in game six game tied 7-7 Barry gets hammered in the lane, yelps, floater is up and BAM!!! series is over Barry is the hero...Shot hear around the well, it was just in the Allen Stephensen gym but still rivoting!!

Brett Goffin (Grade B-) Battier could have been in the A's but a shoulder injury left him on the IR for the last few weeks...With that said he is the first guy you want on your team!!!

Jamie Schweid (Grade A)...Despite the fact that he has been called a chucker and even despite the fact that he missed a bunch of weeks, I am giving this man MVP...Here is the reason, regardless his teams win, they just win...He may shoot 99% of the time he touches the ball but hey something is working!!!

Sam Zornow (Grade B+) last night showed glimpses of a jumper, if that holds he may be the best player in the game, he just may be.

New Guys (and old)

Jay Braunstein...the original commish, plays with heart, plays with soul, he just competes!!!

Joey Barile...Kid is more built then Rusty in his prime, he will be on my team

Josh Deutsche...A Goffin type player in that he can guard big and small...has a jumper to boot

Neal Cohen...potential, he is a gritty player, loves to compete, happy to be in the game!!! Love to have you Neal.

DORF A LIAR???????????

Still not sure how I got picked or why I am writing this blog this week ( considering there really wasn’t an official ‘Gatorade game’), but no use complaining. here you go…..

Dominance

That’s the only way to describe Wednesday evenings festivities. It’s not often when 1 team runs the entire night, but this was one of them. Maybe it had something to do with the new security guard in the lobby, but who knows. Team Jamie Schweeeeed, Barry Herminator, yours truly, and the visiting fat Howie Metzger ran the show. Chalk it up to good team defense, smart fast -breaking, rebounding and good shot selection (until the last game). We seemed to jump out to a 3-0 or 4-0 start each game.

It also didn’t hurt that Cusso ‘Gallinari’ was completely shut down (mostly be Schwied). He was pretty useless and couldn’t rally his team to a victory. He didn’t show any of the talents we have become accustomed to that he learned from his days in the Italian league. Ofcourse, his hair still looked great.

Sam ‘DJ Shiftee’ also wasn’t as aggressive as he usually is at attacking the hoop. Word from the locker room was, Shiftee was too focused on preparing for ‘Dj’ing the 30th b-day party on Friday of the man with no ankles (Jamie). Regardless, he always plays solid D.

Dorf’s head wasn’t in it Wednesday night. Maybe, it was because Jamie flat out called him a BIG FAT LIAR. Boy, he hates that. J

Ostrow and his GIANT TUSH seemed frustrated, & Smitty never really got too involved in the offense with his patent elbow jumpers. Doug was pretty solid as always, but couldn’t ‘break free’ enough.

Side Notes:

-My turkey & Swiss bagel (from across the street): C-
Only put about 5 slices of turkey on it. Very disappointing. Dave Lewis HATES that place, don’t even ask him about it…. Pure Anger.

-Adam Lambert’s performance on American Idol: A
This guy has ‘star’ potential written all over him. He’s got unique voice and if you didn’t hear his rendition of “ The Tracks of My Tears", you missed a good one.

-For those who know Big Dan Ballenger, could him and Michael Sarver (from American Idol) look anymore alike?
Yeah, I watch Americal Idol….and love it.

F- the team who finally beat us that caused me to write this

Josh ' the garage took 20 minutes to find my car' Mandell

It's Gotta be the Shoeeeessssss

As I sit here eating my Sun Chips I'm trying to think what was tonights run all about??? By the way for those of you that questioned it, the bagel with Lox & Cream Cheese was excellent!!!!

First off, Dougy "Deron" Crane was all over the place, as Dave Lewis put it he was picking up the trash. Lose balls, boards, tap outs, it just seemed like the ball was drawn to him tonight...Begs the question is it the shoes???

Dougy has always been famous for his outfits, 8 year old running sneakers Maroon shorts, different maroon colored T-Shirt, Black Socks. Basically Dougy would open his drawer and whatever came out first regardless of Color was what he was going with. Now matching shorts / Shoe combo...Can he be stopped???

Only downside for Dougy was requesting to sit in game 3 after a win because he was tired, this is unheard of!!! The jury is out whether any type of action will be taken against young Crane...Maybe he will be forced to do suicides at the beginning of next weeks run.

On the flip side of the coin, there was Rusty, ohhhh Rusty, this just wasn't your night...He started off Game 1 pinning Schweid to the backboard and recovering the ball, but after that it was all down hill. The shots weren't falling, he was getting frustrated, all in all just not his night. but MAN Schweid he freaking pinned you, PINNED!!!

Cuso was on his game as well, playing to win and he sure did. I believe 5 games in a row...When he wants it man he can bring it.

Smitty rebounded well from the prior week as he came in Angry, questioning Schweids Blog saying the I lit him up...Smitty came out with something to prove and he did erasing memories of his triple double of futility from the prior week.

Is it just me or did Mandell look like he was 14??? New hairdo, clean shaven like a young man in the 11th grade as a Syosset Brave....Josh did you get home yet :)

Zornow was hitting the short jumper, Schweid was well shooting, Jay Braun was solid not good not bad, just getting the job done. Das man Lewis was he normal crafty self and he did play super solid D on Rustyyyyyy.

I personally want to apologize to everyone for not bringing it tonight...St Pattys Day beat me this year...Maybe I'm getting old. I stunk and didn't give the effort on the D-Fensive end...I am sorry!!! What a difference a week makes, Schweid you were right!!!

Better late then Never

Like a fine wine, I wanted this blog entry to age so that I can personally comprehend what happened that faithful Wednesday night March 11th 2009. It was a unseasonably warm day but not for Jon”Lights out” Dorfman. This is a day he will remember forever or at least till the end of this blog.

In 1991, Jon was an amazing basketball player well beyond his years. His patented stutter step wowed the Wahnee faithful and melted the girls hearts. But something happened when jon grew up. People started getting bigger and better than him. That all changed Wednesday.

When Lebron nearly had a triple double last month I thought that was the best basketball performance of the year. Clearly I was wrong. Chris “Smitty” Smith had the difficult task of defensing Dorfman but to no avail. Dorf, hitting jumpers like Drazen Petrovic in NBA Jam couldn’t miss. To steal the words of that heralded video game, he was on fire. Then Smitty, known for his tenacious d and these days a spotty jumper, got up in dorfs face to force him to drive. What did dorfman do you ask? He went right around Smitty showing moves that have not come out since the Reagan presidency. His teammates including the fearless Jared Mancuso were in awe of what they were witnessing.


But just like jimmy Connors run at the 91 us open, dorfs body started to give. His heart didn’t. Utilizing his new teammate Kristian Kordula who was brought down by this hamdsomely good looking but sometimes irresponsible blogger, their team triumphed during the Gatorade game forcing me to write this wonderful blog.

I know what your thinking. why is this whole blog about dorfman. There are two reasons for this.
First and most important, since it took me a week to right this i cant remember a whole lot from that night so for all you young journalists out there taking notes is a good idea if you dont have a photographic memory.

The second and least important is Dorf probably played the best basketball of his life and besides marriage and kids might not have much to look forward to in the next ten years.



Game Notes:
Neil shot 100 percent from the field shattering the record held by Brett Goffin since 1987 when he torched a 5 foot 2 neuron shooting 10 of 14.
Jamie Schweid shot a season high 38 percent on 45 attempts. He however lowered his SWHTTB (Shooting when he touches the ball) percentage to a staggeringly low 89 percent.

See you all Wednesday. God Speed and Please make sure you neuter your pets.

I am out.

A NIGHT TO REMEMBER

In what seemed to be a night like all other nights, it turned out to be anything but! Many peeps were on time and ready to ball out like Ron Artest in the Palace of Auburn Hills, but if you thought you were ready, you knew you needed to bring your game to Kermitt Washington levels on the night he rearranged Rudy J’s face when a young strapping lad entered the building. The time was 6:02pm and a huge cloud of smoke appeared and out of the fog and mist came no other than ….
ANDREW RUSTY TROMBONE RUSAKOFF…. I got several words for that fucking guy.
1. The faded Lebron jersey was a nice touch to go with the jumper. The kid has definitely got the most unblockable jumper of all time. The release point is as High as Kenny Sky Walker and Kryto-Nate Robinson!
2. The man rebounded like Oakley and ran the floor like worthy.
3. Also, Did you notice how the old Rusty trombone tried to rip dudes arms off anytime there was a tie up.
4. In Summary, Don’t ever show up at the run again or it’s going to be like the old Detroit Bad Boys. No Layup without drawing blood.

Now lets switch over to that Mancuso. What an egg that guy laid. I mean besides him lying about that ball going off his leg, he really seemed to be annoyed by the antics of the most annoying man on the floor. No names need be mentioned but he was donning the finest attire of knick colors that kind of stung the eyeballs.

The Attack the Rack Award goes to Zornow. Probably one of the best guys to have on your team because of his defense and ability to get the hole. He single handedily won a few games last night including the first game of the night where he dropped a quintuple singe. 8pts, 4 boards, 2 assists, 2 steals and a blocks. God Bless you young man.

The Baller Awards goes to Goffin. Just kidding. First off, you always disappoint the ladies when you don’t wear one of your sleeveless tees and show off the gun show. God dam Goff, Dougie Schoolboy Crane and Dave “Big Z” Lewis I felt got the best you. I have an eye patch at home from last Halloween if you need it. It seems as though you might have gotten your eye shot out last night.

Tell me Big Z lewis’s game doesn’t remind you a little bit of Zydrunas Ilgauskas.
Some of last night highlights included SPORTY LOU FORTE having a big time night as he filled it up on several occasions. Including a move across the lane against Zornow that really got the crowd into a frenzy.

There were several surprises too. Of course Mandell and Dorfman afraid to face me was no surprise. Unfortunately Mancuso had to find out what John Starks Defense is all about. And it was also no surprise to see Christopher “hair piece” Smith hitting some smooth j’s instead of smoking them for a change. Just kidding, I don’t even know if you do that sort of thing. I personal frown upon it. Until after the game
The surprise was a team that got shutout last night and unfortunately I was a part of that squad. Although it was embarrassing to lose 8-0, the loss was later avenged like the father said in RED DAWN… “BOYZZZZZZZZ, AVENGE MEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!” GOFF, MANCUSO, RUSTY, SMITTY served up the shutout but later just didn’t have the stamina to keep it going.


I look forward to next week. The Gatorade Run is THE BALLLLLLLLLLLLLLLZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ.

Peace,
Barry "Starks" Herman

Wednesday - February 25, 2009

Aiyight fellas. As a member of the losing team of this weeks Gatorade Game - I volunteered to write this weeks write-up -- but before the actual write-up -- I wanted to review the easy rules: (I'm going to do my entire post in bullet-point format - sorry)

• One member of the losing team of the Gatorade game will be responsible for writing an "entertaining piece" on this blog for that week.
• The winning team will collectively decide who the writer for that week will be
• A person who writes it the week before cannot be chosen to write it the following week

Some things to keep in mind when blogging:

• Whatever you write on this page will be available on the information super-highway... Meaning, if you write someones full name - a few days later - if you were to Google that name - this blog would show up.
• So - I recommend merely not using full names. (Ex. Dorf, Goff, Barry, Smitty, etc)
• This is all in fun. You shouldn't take the opportunity to hurt someones feelings. At the same time - if someone says something that hits a nerve - try not to take it too personally....

OK - this weeks run-down ...

• Pretty interesting that the two key "gatorade game" constituents didn't play in this first new twist of the tradition...
  
• My shoulder is killing me this morning - Schweid - how's your jaw?
• Cuso's been playing like he's come back from some major off-season surgery... He's got an EXTREME pass-first mentality recently - which isn't to say he used to be a ball hog - just noticing that he's not been looking for his shot on the regular. I'd be surprised if he's shot 20 times in total the last 3 weeks...
• Surprising on the other end .... Mr Schweid - In games 2 and 3 last night - I calculated (with the oversight of Dorf) that you had a 95% "shoot rate" after you received the ball on offense. Every time you got the rock - you shot it. Now - I'm usually not one to complain about this, because I could be totally fine not taking a single shot in a game - but was just very interesting to analyze...
• The four-some of Schweid, Cuso, Dougie, and Schweids tall friend Connor (the gatorade game winners) are definitely the best foursome to be on the same team at the Allen-Stevenson gym ... and possibly since I've been part of the run.
• Manoff (the guy in the white shirt) came out BLAZING last night. In his first few games - I felt like he shot 80% from the field. Although this is where we old folks will get pissed ... The kid is 22(!) and was crazy winded after game 3...
• The shirt I was wearing last night was one of my favorite to work-out with when I was boxing... Schweid - you were right - I need to retire it until I get back into boxing shape. You should retire the "heavy period" all red out-fit though too...
  
• Barry has really brought some intensity this year to the game. The guy clearly doesn't like to lose ...
  
• The line of the night - Strow: "Was that goal-tending?" (when his 15-ft shot was blocked by Connor)
• Speaking of Strow - he's really been knocking down the pull-up J the past few weeks ...It doesn't look pretty, but I bet he's shooting 50%....
  
• Smitty - to say a fellow Wah-Nee alum is too good for our game is something I don't agree with.... Not to say that I think the run could take the 8 best and win some "A league" at Chelsea Piers ... but moreso that we all pretty much know how to play the game of basketball. Someone could easily have a dominating performance any night - but I don't think Zelmo is "too good" for our run. In fact - what can we do to get him to join one night??
• Speaking of joining us for a night - Smitty - have you ever invited Gus?? Would love to sit-out the game and listen to him call it....
  
• For those that don't know by now - I probably shoot 25% from the free-throw line. (I'll legitimately miss 50% of the time and air-ball or brick it 25% of the time). Please don't be surprised anymore. (I did shoot 2-6 yesterday - but sat both times I was up to sit)
• How about the E. Newman sighting on the way out last night ... Looks like we're not good enough to ball with ... He's joined the 8:00 run...
• Dorf - is Rusty joining the run with Mandell moving? If so - I'm going to be looking more closely before the run as to if Mike is playing or not... Mike - if you've never guarded Rusty - I'm sure you'll get your fair share soon enough...
• For those that are interested in reading the Battier piece (by Micheal Lewis) - click here. It's long - but a great read.
  

That's it fellas ... Until next week...
BG

Wednesday the 18th

Alright fellas, here is the inagural Gatorade Game write up of the Wednesday run!!! Since we are at mid season, I am going to give my breakdown of everyones play thus far...this is one mans opinion, Looking forward to Wednesday!!!!

Brett "Battier" Goffin...Mr. Miscellaneous himself, this is one of the first guys you want on your team, he'll tip a ball, D up anyone, and rarely takes a bad shot...Also he has gotten more aggressive this season. On the Con side he is a Shaqesque foul shooter with a questionable midrange game....Grade B+

Sam "DJ Shady" Zornow...This guy could not only play in the And one basketball league with that handle he could DJ the show!!! Quick as he is relentless Sam is all over the court...Question is can he hit the five footer? Are the loopity loop lay ups good shots??? Time will Tell
Grade B, with the potential of A

John "Mullin" Ostrow...He has come out gunning, is good for around 2 - 4pts a game, couple of boards, throw in an assist and he's dangerous...On D though who do you have him guard, small quick guy, big man??? It just presents match up issues...All in all though Mr. Strow has been a great addition Grade B-

Dave "the small big man" Lewis...6'3" prefers to play on the outside. Versatile though in that he can play BAD D on both small and big men. Dangerous from the corner, Dangerous on the hook, he can play inside, but can also nail those jumpers. When he's on he's downright dangerous, whennnn he's on. Playing and shooting well this season, also a soon to be Daddy which may shift his focus a bit...Grade B

Chris "Don't call me Chris" Smith...Hot and Cold, when Smitty is on the 10-15ft game is automatic, he loves to flash of screens coming high and is deadly, however if he's missing he's known to get in his own head. A Hustler on D and is more then willing to defend anyone, this part of his game has improved. Grade B-...I don't think we've seen his best yet

Jon "ass still pulled" Dorfman...tough to grade yourself. Still has a handle and when/if he's hitting a jumper is a tough guard. However that is a big whennnnnn, jumper has not been falling. Defense has been spotty at best and the intensity has been lacking at times. Maybe the commissioner duties are weighing on him. A lot of room for improvement, at least I hope!!! Grade C+

Josh "the knacker papa" Mandell...Wahnee pride personified, Josh rebounds like a big man, can shoot, can dribble, can play D, he does it all. Tends to get in his own head though if he gets off to a slow start, even more Cuso OWNS him...All in all a solid start for Mandell, he is moving to Long Island though and having a British Baby so he attendance will be spotty in the second half...He will be missed Grade B

Jared "the hair" Mancuso...This is the toughest to grade. In my opinion the best offensive player on the court, creates the toughest match ups, however like Randy Moss he tends to take off some plays now and again. By his own words will rarely lose when trying. Have we ever really seen his best? Does his intensity match his talent? What does he put in his hair?? Grade B+, potential A+ player.

Mike "the Giant" Lee...Some head of hair on him as well!!! Another tough grade, he demands the ball in the clutch, plays with intensity, and can board. However, shot selection is a question and tends to get stripped by the little guys...Also, that boy can bleed. All in all though I don't think we have seen Mikes best I think he needs another big man out there to push him, any see Rusty??? Grade B-

Doug "the european" Crane...He'll score 4 pts on ya and you won't know how he did it. He can shoot from anywhere on the court, can D up both small / Big, and has the lefty shot to boot. Only question is his conditioning and intensity from time to time...Also has missed a few too many weeks, otherwise he would be the midseason MVP...Grade A-

Jamie "shoot til you make" Schweid...A versatile scorer can post you up, shoot from the outside, or drive the hoop...Has post moves like McHale...A competant defender can D up both small and big...Rivals Cuso as the #1 offensive threat out there and outshines him at times because of his intensity. Downside is if he's missing he is still shooting, so blow outs are possible. Burger travels have kept him out, so again I don't think we've seen his best...Grade A-

Barry "the tornado" Herman...Energy personafied, this boy is a non stop wind up doll...With his nice demeanor who would ever think him a criminal. Barrys energy and D makes him a desirable teammate, if he can find his shot he will be downright dangerous Grade B-

Lou “the tank” Forte...Competitor, plays tough, plays hard, and plays to win. Solid lefty / righty cross over and jumper from the top of the key. No real holes in his game, however height presents match up problems now and again. Will last weeks frackus with Dorfman soften him up? Has he peeked too soon, time will tell. Grade B+

Matt "where am I" Usedin...This kid can ball, hard to do however when you're not actually in the gym...Some day, Some day!!! Grade D- (he did pay on time)

Gatorade Game -- The New Rules

OK - Fellas. The past 2 "seasons" the Gatorade aspect of our Wednesday run has been softened considerably. We don't think it's the $2 - it's more laziness, and after playing hoops for 2 hours, wanting to get home to wife/kids...Doing an errand is the last thing we want to do ... SO ... We've come up with a new rule...

From now on, the last game of the run will still be known as the Gatorade Game. BUT ... Rather than each member of the team buying another member of the team a Gatorade, ONE member of the team will be responsible for entertaining the league with a blog post on this blog...

You can write about the run, you can tell a funny story that happened to you (or someone else in the run) that week, or whatever you want. You just need to entertain the league for that week.

The person who will represent the losing team in writing the blog will be chosen "Anchorman style" - or for those non-Wah-Nee-ers ... The winning team will collectively select who writes the blog.

The blog post will need to be posted before the next run ... and will need to be more than 100 words. (No - you don't need to count the words -- but you can't just say something like "Cuso is soft and Mandel is having a knacker-baby" and leave it at that. Peace")

For those that think this is annoying or lame ... Here's some advice ... Don't be on the losing team.

There will be a penalty for not writing the blog post (and not having a really good excuse) - that is yet to be determined. (Example - failure to not write the blog X times makes you up for expulsion the following season or something like that ... again TBD)